Seriously, how many times have you tried to make “it” work?

You told yourself that if you adjust your mindset, “it’ll” work out.

Or, if you give “it” a little bit more time, things will get better.

But who you kiddin? 

You’ve known yourself as long as you’ve been you.

And even you realize when you’re blowing smoke up your own tuchus….

Despite dyslexia being the most widely spread neurodiversity on the planet, we all face different challenges, strengths and contradictions.

There isn’t a single characteristic we have collectively - we’re all the same kind of different.

The Fix is Out 

I’m not much of a builder or handyman. 

About the only thing I can fix is dinner! 

But the one Golden Rule I still remember from my a semester of woodshop at Haverford Junior High in Pennsylvania is that - you should never sand against the grain.

Which is why it’s painful to witness countless LEX adults sanding against their brains’ grain:

• Taking day shift jobs when your brain doesn't come online until 2pm
  

• Frantically scribbling notes in meetings when you absorb way more from recordings
  

• Applying for detail-heavy roles when you're wired for big-picture strategy

The Grain Train

Now I said it pains me. I didn’t say that I haven’t been guilty of it too.

There was a good 10 year period where I held a first class ticket on the Going Against the Grain Train. 

Not having any real bank-able skills, I bounced around from job to job.

But my lack of skill making $krill wasn’t my only challenge.

I also had slow brain processing speed which made job hopping more of a nightmare…

Each new job was like drinking from a firehose. 

I had info, systems, people's names to remember. A new schedule, travel route and a whole new set of insecurities about things I knew nothing about - turning anxiety up to a 27 out of 10.

By the time I reached my 30’s, I’d been hired and fired from a too many jobs - it was embarrassing.

After a move from Seattle to San Francisco, I tried choosing gigs more wisely, to mixed results.

Wherever You Go, You Bring Yourself

When I moved from dead-end jobs into working in offices, I faced similar challenges but with different monsters.

Although I had a few things going against me, there were 5 Red Flags:

• Desperation: Just happy to get a job. No standards

• Scatterbrain Job Searches: All over the place - no continuity 

• Lack of Deep Preparation: Enough research to get the job but not do it well enough 

• No Connection: The only thing that drew me in was that they were hiring
  

• Missing Mentor: My biggest wins have always come through mentorship, coaching and/.or accountability

Say It Isn’t Sonny

Looking for work is one of the most stressful parts of life. 

You add difficulties with forms, staying organized and the interview process…

Plus the following up, rejection, keeping a positive attitude and making up some BS about why you’d be the ideal employee for Sonny’s Screendoors for Submarines in the mall!!!!

PUHLEEEEASE!

Whether it's a job, romance, roommate or school, just because you can doesn’t mean you should.

And when you can't afford to turn work down, you do what you have to while watering your dream on the side.

Keyless Entry

The key is to stay curious and keep learning. 

Learn a trade, find out what you care about.

Despite hearing this for years, I wasn't listening.

Find the hidden patterns influencing your work decisions.

Figure out which dyslexic thinking skills jibe with you the most.

Late Bloomer 

Early on, I don’t think I had enough self-respect to envision what I wanted life to look like.

I postponed important decisions while pretending to be busy. In truth, just spinning my wheels going nowhere fast.

Eventually I started taking steps more in line with my skills, values and sensibilities.

I developed a skill-set and focused on being in supportive spaces.

Even without knowing about my dyslexia, I looked for workplaces with a good rep, good vibes and people who had my best interest at heart.

Did it work out each time?

Absolutely NOT!

But at least I developed Standards and some hireable skills in the process.

Raise

Raising your Standards helps you realize what you deserve.

Those higher Standards don't make you better than others.

They allow you to decide how you want to be treated.

So as I sit writing at my desk, the days of trying to fit a marshmallow into a keyhole are behind me.

No amount of wishful thinking will ever make it fit.

Standards Raised…

S'mores Out!

I'm a stand up guy - sitting down.